英译诗词《东风第一枝》（相见两悠扬）

香格里拉

 

 

 

The Pioneer Blooming In The Spring Breeze


By Melodious Encounter
Tr. By Shangri-La


A verse by Huiweng reads: Today along the road by River Clear, plum buds burst earliest as a pioneer. And another one

says: Plum buds burst forth heavenly aroma ahead of peers. In our first encounter, you appeared pure, brisk and unique,

like a plum blossom. Even if reticent, you sent forth heavenly fragrance able to melt ice and snow. I can never forget you

since. Not to mention the persons who didn’t understand me, the ones that did wondered what in you enchanted me.

Today I made a poem to convey my deep love of you, with the rhyme of the Chinese character Bu, according to the laws

of Seven Encounters.


Your buds burst forth heavenly fragrance, unique on the earth, ahead of peers in ice and snow

I prefer your charms towards evening, with amorous looking, leaning against you

Until the gloaming veils the islet shallow, hazing the way home along the Clear River on flow

How can I forget the days of versing while drinking, in the thick flowers the night whole


I mount the frosting tower, murmuring fondly at your shadow. I inquire over and over, pouring myself out in a whisper low

Your warm scent permeates through the writing paper slow, with pure pistil figures lingering in the letter also

How I should dedicate the affection you know, so as not to have missed your dream long ago

Let the poem of making our farewells, composed by the breeze of next spring to follow

 

 

 

东风第一枝


相见两悠扬


晦翁诗云：“今日清江路，寒梅第一枝”。又：“横出天香第一枝”。忆初相见，君若梅花，清绝奇冽，纵默默无语，

亦横放天香而融冰雪矣。从此不能忘。知我者，尚谓我何求，不知我者，自不必言。今占得“七遇”部步字，依律填词，

慰我款款。。。


横放天香，人间奇绝，一枝冰雪独步。

晚来犹爱妖娆，脉脉为君倚佇。

汀洲日暮，便掩却、清江归路。

怎忘得、诗酒生涯，竟夜晓红深处。


临霜阁、低语眷顾。问几度、耳边倾诉。

暖芳更染云笺，玉蕊碧痕尺素。

此情难注，怕早与、梦魂相误。

待写就、明年春风，送我别时词赋。

梅景~

————沙发————

梅景~

————美文美译，精彩飞扬。。。

梅景~

————香格里拉 ，辛苦了，感谢又为诗歌版带来精彩之作，请你吃西瓜。。。。。。

香格里拉

梅景~ 发表于 2014-6-23 11:15
————美文美译，精彩飞扬。。。

梅版。终于折腾完毕，排版整齐了 ... ...

香格里拉

梅景~ 发表于 2014-6-23 11:17
————香格里拉 ，辛苦了，感谢又为诗歌版带来精彩之作，请你吃西瓜。。。。。。

谢谢梅版！一起吃西瓜 ... ...

香格里拉

encounter "邂逅”，"遇到”，词意即指（两人）“见面”，所以 "相见两悠扬" 名字直接译为 Melodious Encounter，

翻译中不再重复出现含有“两”意义的词。

香格里拉

今日清江路，寒梅第一枝。

Today along the road by River Clear, plum buds burst earliest as a pioneer.


翻译为符合中文古典诗歌英译的特点，clear 与 pioneer 押尾韵。

香格里拉

为与原词保持一致，句尾词 snow, you, shallow, flow, whole, shadow, low, also, know, ago, follow 押尾韵。

香格里拉

最后一句 Let the poem of making our farewells, composed by the breeze of next spring to follow（待写就、明年春风，

送我别时词赋）译文用 let sb do 结构更加简洁易懂，但为与之前其它词句押相同的尾韵，改用 let sth done 的结构。

句子结构变了，句意不变。